What a blessed life

Sometimes I am amazed at how fast time just flies. These have been the happiest months of my life. I feel as if we are complete.

The trip to Colorado was an eventful one. We were so busy hanging around with family and doing nothing, which is the perfect thing! The trip began in Beaver Creek (Arrowhead) at my parents home. We snowboarded every day, had fantastic dinners and just enjoyed each other, along with our family of the Pluckers, Rue's and Case's. Above is a picture of Jessica knitting a hat while Jackson slept. We were blessed with beautiful weather.

Close up shot.

We gave him a baths every other day singing him "Showers of blessings." It was so wonderful to share these moments with my sister and mother. 

Jackson is now cooing, smiling, laughing, staring into your eyes, batting at his gym and he rolled over for the first time!

We then headed down to Denver to enjoy some more extended family time. My nana met Jackson for the first time. What a wonderful experience to see old and new together. She was so precious while kissing his little hands and feet. We also enjoyed evenings with the cousins, watching the Bachelor and eating lots of pizza. It was so wonderful to connect and watch them interact with Jackson. 

Aaron and I also went up to Fort Collins for the day. We visited with Kerry  (& Bryce) and got to see her new place and life. It was very nostalgic as neither of us have spent a significant amount of time there since we graduated back in 2008. It was great to see the campus and re-live old memories of us where we fell in love. Time goes by too quickly. 

A dear friend from high school, Jessica Barth, is having a baby any day now! So, her friend Monica threw her a surprise baby shower for her and Jacob. I was so excited and blessed that I was able to be a part and surprise her. Can't wait for your arrival sweet boy!

We were blessed enough to stay at the Broadmoor in Colorado Springs, the place where Aaron and I got married. There is a fantastic Sunday brunch there. This is Jackson's first Sunday brunch meal...pretty much the same as every meal, but he had a fancy bib and onesie on! (which he preceded to spit up on later!) 

Of course a visit to Granny Jan was necessary. We played Dominos and ate some of Aunt Kate's homecooked chili (it was AMAZING!) with Scott and Dan there as well. It was so much fun to be back and celebrating time with them.

After time in Colorado Springs we headed back up to the mountains. Here is our family at Splendidos with my parents. I just love Jack's face here, it's priceless. It reminds me of Jack's second cousin Ella, and her "stinky face!"

A bit of a small paragraph does not do justice to how amazing the trip was. We were able to bond with so many family and friends and enjoy a fabulous life for 4 very short weeks. 

We came home and Jackson got his two month vaccinations. I went by myself, and it was the most horrific experience to date. To watch your child go through pain like that is gut wrenching. The last two days have been Jack sleeping and whimpering while he's awake. Some "smiles for miles," but not too many. Get better soon my love. 

 Thanks to everyone we saw for your love support and prayers as our sweet baby continues to grow. 

And thanks to God, from whom all blessings flow.

Two Months!

I hate that I haven't written, but no one can say that we certainly haven't been busy. We have been blessed to be in Colorado since February 29th, staying through the entire month of March. It has been filled with wonderful memories of laughing and sharing time with amazing friends and family.

I will update more on the trip when we get home, adding pictures and such. But I couldn't skip our baby's 2 month birthday.

Happy Birthday sweet Jackson. We can't imagine our lives without you.

One Month Birthday!

Jackson Taylor McLaughlin

Wow, I can't even believe Jackson is two weeks old as of tomorrow. I am constantly reminded at how absolutely blessed we are to have such a wonderful, perfect baby boy.

Okay, I must start with the basic details of Jackson. He was born on Sunday January 22nd @ 12:21 am. He weight 7lbs 13oz, and was 19.5 inches long.

Here is a couple of photos of Aaron and I on Friday evening prior to going into the hospital at 12am. The first couple hours after he was born, I kept telling Aaron how strange it was, movements he was making I could recall him making while inside my tummy. I said more than once to sweet Jackson, "so that's what you were doing while inside!"

Once arriving at the hospital at 12 am on Friday night (technically Saturday morning). They placed the pill inside and said, "now try and get some rest." Needless to say, Aaron and I both got very little sleep. I started to feel the "wave" motions of contractions early in the morning. I didn't feel the need to call the nurse, I just let them ride. They were uncomfortable, but didn't hurt too much. When 7am came, they checked to see that I was naturally 3cm dilated! What a great way to start off. So, they started the pitocin and the contractions really started to kick in.

They still weren't too bad though. Jessica was able to french braid my hair and we were able to sit around and watch movies. Please excuse how bloated and exhausted I already look. Those IVs pump you with an insane amount of fluid! 

At 11:45 am they felt it was best to break my water, since I was not progressing naturally from 3cm. This was by far the weirdest feeling of my life! It felt like they were breaking a balloon inside of me. So strange. Then, after that, the contractions really started to kick in. I wanted to try and go as long as possible without the epidural, but I knew if the pain got one step above where it was, I couldn't handle it. So, about 2 hours after they broke my water, I received the epidural. Talk about scary. When they tell you not to move, and you're having a painful contraction while they're placing something in your spine...it's quite scary! 

But alas, epidurals are your friend! Things became numb for about 3-4 hours. I had progressed to 5cm, but things were not going any faster. When evening started to approach, I began to feel an immense amount of pain in my lower back. It was horrid. Come to find out Jackson's head was turned to the side, which creates and insane amount of back labor. They ended up providing me with more pain medication because it got so intense. 

The rest of the evening was a bit of a blur. They placed my on oxygen due to Jackson not receiving as much because of the placement of his head. I still was not progressing past 5cm, so the thought of a C-Section became very real. Then, at around 8pm, I felt the sudden urge to push. I asked Aaron to get the nurse immediately, they came in an said I had dilated to 9.5cm. What a shock!

The quick jump from 5cm to 9.5cm was a bit too much for Jackson. His heart rate quickly plummeted and was eventually lost. This put the staff into overdrive. All of the sudden a group of nurses and doctors came rushing in. They threw me on my side and gave me a shot to immediately stop my contractions. They kept switching my positions to try and relax Jackson as much as possible. 

"Be still and know that I am God." is the only words that kept running through my head as I panicked. Absolutely, the scariest moments of my life. 

Thankfully, Jackson relaxed and his heart beat came back (we knew he had a strong heart!), and the contractions stopped. I asked the nurses to give me an hour (if it was medically okay to do so) to recover from this horrific event, prior to starting the pitocin again. 

We prayed. 

Once the pitocin started again, it was pretty quick after that. One can push anywhere between 1-3 hours. I was determined to get him out as soon as possible. About 45 minutes after pushing, Jackson McLaughlin was born into this world! 

First picture of Jackson, just minutes old. 

What a surreal and wonderful experience. I could not do everyday life without my wonderful husband and support from such a loving and fantastic family. We thank the Lord every day for a healthy and wonderful baby boy. 

God is good. All the time. No matter what.

The day...will come!

So here I sit, 7:45 PM on Thursday, January 19th. I am 40 weeks and 3 days pregnant. Jack is estimated to be at 7.5lbs - 8lbs, but he may as well be larger than life.

Needless to say, the last few days have been some of the longest in my life. We are in constant waiting mode for him to show some sign of wanting to come and say hi to the world.

But, as we found out today in our doctor's appointment, no progression in my cervix in almost three weeks. Sure, it's a bit thinner, but Jackson is comfy right where he's at.

So, tomorrow night is the night. We will be going into the hospital at 12 am. They're going to give my cervix a "softener," then start pitocin on Saturday, January 21st. So, it looks as if Jackson will greet this world on Saturday.

I think if I wrote any more than that right now, my head may spin. So many thoughts, I just don't know where to even start.

At the core of it all, I will remember: This is God's love child. This will all go according to His will, and sweet Jackson will be in our arms very soon.

All the love in the world, sweet boy. We absolutely cannot wait any longer.

Reminder to be humble

We have been humbly reminded that God is control over all things. 

On the 10th, it felt like Christmas morning all over again. We were so excited and 3:50pm could not come fast enough. To think we would leave the doctor's office with a date to be induced was exhilarating and so exciting. 

Okay, I can tell you I'm writing this with no baby in hand, and it is the 13th. So I'm assuming you can figure out how things turned out. 

When he went to check my cervix, turns out I made absolutely no progression from the appointment on the 5th. Dr Hayton sincerely felt scraping the membranes would cause more harm to me physically, and wouldn't progress things enough. Since there had been no growth, he highly recommended we keep our next appointment (January 19th, 4 days after the due date) and scrape the membranes then, and schedule the date to be induced. 

Needless to say, this was a total shock to us, (Dr. Hayton was also a bit surprised considering my progression over the last few weeks). We were going to go out and celebrate with my parents for dinner. I had Aaron call my mom to cancel as we walked out of the office, I really couldn't speak I was so disappointed. In that moment I was so grateful to have compassionate parents who totally understood where we were coming from. 

Aaron was an amazing support, letting me just look out the window with tears in my eyes. The thought of up to 12 more days of being pregnant in anticipation during this moment seemed even more than an eternity. As I sat there and prayed for God's reassurance, I was humbled in realizing that Jackson is still God's miracle child, and he has placed the perfect timing for Jackson's arrival, which is something that even the doctors don't always have control over. 

I have been reminding myself more and more of the constant blessing of an extremely healthy pregnancy, a healthy baby and a wonderful family. These are such blessings that only God could provide for us and I am in awe of his amazing grace. 

Not to say we haven't been doing whatever we can to help speed as much as we can along naturally! 

My last official day of work was on Wednesday, January 11th. What an odd feeling. It really hasn't even sunk in yet. I guess the reason being is that we don't know what we will be doing come April. Part time? Full time? Quit altogether? Thankfully, all the family has the same goal in mind to have me quit work all together, but time, the market, and finances will tell. I am so at peace knowing this is in God's hands, and we cannot know some of these answers for some time. 

Bret took me out to a wonderful goodbye lunch with all the best wishes in the world. How blessed am I to have such a wonderful job filled with so many wonderful people? 

So now, we wait. My mother and I went to Disneyland yesterday and walked the whole park for 5 hours. We had a fantastic and memorable dinner last night with Chad & Candace at a place that has a notorious reputation for their "Orgy" pizza, which puts women into labor within 24 hours. It had so many toppings on it that I hate, but I forced it down in hopes for some good results...nothing yet... God, couldn't you just have let them sprinkle a little pitocin on the top? Just kidding.

To quote myself, quoting Eeyore the donkey when I was 5 years old..."Days, weeks, months, who knows..." 

All the love in the world to my little stubborn baby Jackson! I'm so glad my tummy is a comfortable and safe place for you!

What due date?

Today it has really dawned on me how much due dates are so "approximate." I felt as if I had to write today, because January 5th was my original due date. That has now come and gone.

But, I did have an appointment today with my wonderful Dr, Dr. Hayton. He's so funny and has such a dry sense of humor. I love it. For the last 5 weeks or so, my mother typically goes with me to my appointments. Mainly because they're so non-eventful, and it's so nice to have the company after an hour or so of waiting for the doctor.

Today I am 38 weeks and 3 days along. Jackson is estimated to weight 7+ lbs, and he is head down. Dr. Hayton says my cervix is thinning, after checking me out thoroughly (and quite painfully) which are all good signs of progressing nicely.

Lately I've been in a bit of a funk not feeling as if I have any control over when he will actually be here. (as per my last entry...) So, it's been taking a lot of prayer and reliance on God to know that he has the answers.

Not that today really gave me all the "answers," but it certainly helped put my mind at ease. Our next Dr.'s appointment is on Tuesday the 10th (that's only 5 DAYS away...). At this appointment, he will scrape my membranes (not sure what all of this entails, but apparently this is a safe and natural way to help spur on labor). Typically labor naturally starts after this is done in about 3 to 4 days. But, on the 10th, we're able to schedule a day that we would want to be induced, should scraping the membranes not work. So, we're batting around 17th or 18th to give him a bit more time.

But knowing that on just Tuesday things will hit an even bigger milestone is such a relief. There still are so many unknowns, but it was nice to finally discuss "the end result." I feel like he's so big he could be walking already!

Also, I think I'm a bit tired of all of the comments. "Wow! Look how BIG you are! I swear you grow every day!" or "When you turn the corner, the first thing I see is your belly!" or the all awesome giggle when someone walks by me and I have food in my hand. Hey, it's lunch time, aren't you going to eat too? Geez! 

But I'm enjoying and trying to relax with Aaron on the quiet times. I'm praying Merlin & Lola will adjust smoothly to Jack's arrival as well. I'm a  bit concerned about Merlin since he's a bit obsessed with me (hey, I know I'm a big deal!). So we'll see if he adjusts smoothly to a baby in the house.

Otherwise, things are definitely winding down with work, which is a nice thing. I feel so blessed with all of the support and love I've received from so many co-workers and clients! It's been amazing.

Jack, you're so loved, and your arrival is so very much anticipated by so many. God has already blessed your life, and I can't wait to kiss your sweet face.