More than self-sacrifice

I don't think it's possible to fully understand the scope of being a parent until you become a grandparent.

And probably even then, there's new lessons in parenting to learn.

Okay, here's the current state of the little man.

Finally.

I have had a battle with my soul regarding "cry it out." And, I'm sure I'm not the first parent either. But, when you've been trying to get your baby to sleep for the past hour and half (you know he's tired.) He's had a full meal, no poopy diaper, no teething issues. He's just cranky.

After an hour and half of walking around the neighborhood, swinging him, nursing him (I caved...but for just a minute) this little man would NOT fall asleep. So I had one last resort.

I came home, gave him a nice bath and put on his mobile with music, and left the room with him staring at the mobile.

I brought the monitor with me into my room to take a shower. About 5 minutes in, the crying began.

I intentionally took one of the longest showers of my life. This way, at least the crying was muted. I thought maybe the pain I was feeling would be less.

After getting out of the shower I went to check on him very quickly. I wanted to make sure he had not cried so hard he pooped. (Seriously, this is how hard he was crying.) I picked him up to check and he immediately stopped crying. This is when I really knew I was doing the right thing. So I set him back down, tried to put the pacifier in his mouth (needless to say that did no good) and walked out the door with tears streaming down my face.

A total of 45 minutes of straight crying, and he finally passed out.

Being a parent is more than self-sacrifice. It's more than eating the majority of your meals cold because you need to feed him or change a diaper and it's more than waking up every Saturday at 7:00am.

I'm learning just as much as he is. So I guess I always have to remember that we're in it together. And at times, it will be painful for both of us.

Forever and a day

Time is flying. I wouldn't say it's because life is so magical. Moving, working 35+ hours a week, and raising our son has kept me more than busy. Through all of it, I keep reminding myself how amazing we truly do have it, and how much of this is God's blessings that we are working through.

We are officially living on Iris Avenue in Corona Del Mar! We could not be more excited. I will post pictures up as soon as the house is completely in order. It's taken us some adjusting, but it's been wonderful. We are in the process of getting some new furniture, which is an amazing thing as well! All the purchasing is completed, now it's the waiting game for it all to arrive.

Here's a picture of us in front of our old apartment. We transitioned from blissful newlyweds to happy parents in just three short years.

Our little Jackson man has also had a lot of "firsts" these days! Everything is so exciting and new to us still as first time parents. We are definitely enjoying the ride.

He had his first meal about a week ago! Yummy rice cereal with breast milk. Needless to say, it was quite a mess. One, because Daddy made it a bit too soggy, and two, well, it was his first meal!

The picture is a little blurry, but hey, we had to capture the moment.

He really loved it a lot. So now, we are feeding him once in the morning, and we try to once at night, thicker and thicker each time. Our schedule has been so hectic lately though, we are lucky if we get the once in the morning down right.

Okay, I posted this picture because it's just precious and I love his sweet little face.

Side note: this boy HATES the car. I never thought there would be a day where he would. He used to fall right asleep the second we step foot in it, now he cries pretty much the entire way to our destination, unless he's asleep before hand. Any tips mommies? We've given him all the toys in the world for distraction, and we sing to him to see if that helps, sometimes, I just have to let him cry it out...breaks my heart!

But, most of the time, he looks like this.

Love that gummy grin. He's teething now-a-days as well, which doesn't make mommy's heart feel too good. The pediatrician said he was young for teething. We haven't seen an actual tooth yet, but you can see it trying to break through on the bottom left center!

He is still sleeping in our room next to me. We are going to re-paint his room to green and eggshell thick stripes. We are (hoping) to get this done this weekend or the next. For the fumes, we can't really keep him sleeping in the room, so we plan to transition him afterwards.

So, I have a few more nights as he continues to grow before our eyes. Although, it will be nice to not wake up every 2 hours to check on him. I do this without an alarm, or even wanting to. He's sound asleep, it just happens! So, I'm hoping this will stop once he switches rooms so I can get some decent rest.

Although, I feel like I'm going to be sleep deprived until all of our children are here. And happily so. The more hours I get to spend with my precious family, the better!

One more cute one, of our little guy grabbing his sweet little piggies. He finally discovered those toes that I have been munching on for quite some time now.

Boy oh Boy!

..and certainly no longer a newborn! We have a full blown baby on our hands.

Our sweet boy is 4 months old today. He's had some milestones this week that have really made it obvious to me that my baby is growing up...way too fast.

When we hold Jackson on our laps, he loves to stand on his legs. He is so strong now that all you really need to do is keep him balanced, and he uses all his tiny little muscles on his own! So, we decided it was time to pull out the bouncy play thing (I have no idea what the real name is!). He's just barely old enough, but he loves it. I'm now wondering if he'll ever really crawl much. If you want my prediction, I think this boy is going walk really early. Anyone want to place a bet?

Just a pic below of him being goofy today...on his 4 month birthday!

Jack...with all of his pacifiers. He was very pacified. 

He has really loved his baby bjorn. We think he does because he loves to be facing out. Needless to say, this means that his infant car seat is no longer a favorite of his. He loves to cry & wail every time we place him in there. He used to love our walks/runs, but now...not so much! So, we decided to try to place him the correct way in the stroller.

 He sure looks so tiny! But, he loves to look out around at the world. It makes me happy he's still looks so small, so that way I know he's not growing up literally before my eyes.

He's had some great bonding time looking over bonds with daddy. He looks so serious working.

He's also enjoyed some lounging time watching cartoons with daddy, too! (Okay, it was The Simpsons, but we feel like that's still okay considering he's still in baby-talk mode!)

And, I have to end with a sweet picture of him, looking absolutely angelic in my eyes. 

I'm trying to not go crazy with a constantly messy house. Oh, the joys of moving! So, no one is invited over for quite some time. Don't be too offended.

A Very Special Mother's Day

Not only was this mother's day special because it was my first, but there were two other reasons it was amazingly special:

1. We were able to spend it with my parents in Washington D.C.
2. We found out one year ago that we were pregnant with our sweet boy.

What I find so incredible about the entire story is the fact that none of this was really planned. Aaron and I were on the slow track to kiddos. Doctors told me that we were going to have trouble getting pregnant for a variety of reasons. So, Aaron and I played the "whatever happens, happens" method. This method went on for a year and half. We were ready spiritually and as a couple to have a baby, we just weren't in any hurry.

Then, our little miracle love came about.

And we certainly couldn't imagine a life any other way.

God places amazing and overwhelming and exciting and exhausting tasks in front of us, sometimes when we least expect them. And, I really could not be more grateful for the wonderful opportunity he's provided Aaron and I in raising Jackson. What a glorious responsibility. 

Life has been incredibly complicated the last four weeks. While getting adjusted to a new work schedule, preparing to move and a trip clear across the country, Jackson is continuously growing and changing every day. 

We went to Washington D.C. for a week. Aaron had a work conference in Chantilly, VA. My father also had to go, so it was  a great excuse for my mom and I to tag along. After 4 days in Chantilly, we went to Washington D.C. (about a 30 minute drive) for 3 days. Aaron had never been before, and since we're such big history buffs, we all were super excited. Some photos of our adventures:

The boys at the Air & Space Museum

In front of the space shuttle that just landed 3 weeks ago!

Aaron and I at the Lincoln Memorial. Jack was passed out in his stroller

My mom and Aaron at the Lincoln Mermorial

The only awful picture of us at Mother's day brunch. Jack was a bit grouchy at the moment.

Jack's first subway ride! He looks like a bit of a goof.

The family in the subway. Aaron really felt like a tourist. Jack is sucking his thumb. We are weird. 

On a side note: he loves the Baby Bjorn! So fantastic. 

At the moment Aaron and I barely have the time to breathe. I have a feeling it will be this crazy until we move and get settled in. 

I'm attempting to get used to being in the office Mondays & Wednesdays, then working from home the other three. It's been a bit of a rough transition for me to be sure I stay on top of the requirements that work has while still working (a.k.a being paid) part time. The industry of trade shows, I swear, is a 24/hr a day job no matter how many clients you have. So, I'm slowly learning to prioritize and be more organized in my work load. 

But, we are constantly reminded how amazing we have it.

Gotta go, the little one has woken from his slumber. What the life!

Baby Wise vs. Happiest Baby on the Block

Should it even be a "vs?" Maybe it should be an "and." Okay, I guess I'll explain myself.

The time is quickly approaching that little sweet Jackson will have to be placed in his own room. And I am dreading the thought. Aaron and I are moving to our new home on June 1st. (YAY!) Here's a picture from the outside.

Corona Del Mar, here we come! 3 bedrooms, and two baths. We couldn't be more excited. Our rent currently in Newport Beach is just too much, so after 3 wonderful years of living there, we've decided to depart. Jackson's room is currently in the loft upstairs, which I'm not too crazy about him sleeping alone up there with the cats roaming free. They're so good with him, but hey accidents happen. And I'm a paranoid new mother!

We're so excited that he's getting his OWN room! But, this means no more bassinet. So, he'll be about 4 and a half months old when the official switch is made.

I read "Baby Wise" before Jack was born, and really thought that it made some great points about self soothing and attempting to sleep through the night. Jack has always been a pretty good sleeper and self-soother, so I was hoping it would just be a natural transition.

From when he was 10 lbs all the way to three months, Jack would sleep (un-swaddled) for 6 to 7 (sometimes 8!) hours a night in our room, uninterrupted. So wonderful!

Here's a pic of the little man taking a nap in his "natural" position!

Then, three months came around. Right after his shots, he started waking up every 2 to 3 hours to eat. He wouldn't start crying, but he certainly would be awake and apparently upset. I'd feed him and he'd go right back to sleep. It was then recommended to me to read the book "Happiest baby on the Block." And boy, has this book absolutely changed my sleeping life. I feel like a new person. (But hey, I think every new mom could use more sleep than she's allowed!)

They recommend the 5 "S's," which do make sense. Swaddling, side/stomach, Shhhhing, swinging, and sucking. Now, this book tells you to do these items in a certain order, especially if you have a colicky baby. Well, thankfully this was not Jack's problem. But, at the end of the book, they talk about how to get your baby to sleep through the night. So between 8-9 pm, I give Jack a full feeding. At this point, he's usually very tired, but cranky because he can't quite get to sleep. Then, we swaddle him. One thing I didn't know that I found so interesting is that babies don't like the ACT of being swaddled, so most parents assume their babies hate BEING swaddled. Well, this concept worked for Jack. We swaddled him as tight as we possibly could (even using packing tape to keep it secure. Aaron thought I was nuts!) with his arms at his sides. Then, we walk around the house with him for about two minutes, so he is calmed again. We then place him in his bassinet (half awake, is possible), and VOILA! The sweet child has slept for 7-9 hours consistently every night. Definitely recommend this book to any new mom. No letting him "cry it out..." at least yet. I'm hoping I never have to go there, as that may just break my heart. Literally.

I think moving him into his own room will be more tough on me than Jack. My little boy is growing up.

In other news, our sweet boy is loving his BUMBO chair! He looks like an old man sitting in it, but it's so adorable. When we eat at the house, he always sits in this on the table and we can have a little conversation with our little man. He's starting to grab things, he loves rattles and toys that play music. We have this adorable little aquarium that his Great Aunt Kate bought him, it rotates little fishies and plays music. It's like baby TV. He's enthralled!

 As I wind down my second week at work full time, I am constantly trying to remind myself of how many blessings God has provided to us. He says, "follow me, and I will show you."  He does not show us, and then asks us to follow. This has been extremely difficult considering the large decisions that I have to make by tomorrow afternoon at 5pm.

Thankfully, I have a wonderful and supportive family that loves me either way. But, I am having such a hard time deciding. Prayers & support are so greatly appreciated.

Happy 3 month birthday!

Okay, I'm a day early. Sorry Jack! But I was too excited to post updates on life. It has been such a wild ride. We are trusting in the Lord daily that His plan will be shown. And it is beginning to materialize. We are truly blessed.

I say this every time, but it is certainly the truth. I can't believe Jackson is 3 months old tomorrow. It's just crazy how fast time flies during the happiest time of your life.

Seriously, best thing ever.

Here are some happy moments to share. Hope all of you are doing well! Prayers and love to all!

Trip to Colorado...in snapshots